"I recently had two curious conversations at a friend’s wedding. Attempting to make small talk after the touching ceremony, a woman I didn’t know turned to me next to the salads and said, “Wasn’t it gorgeous? I cried through it all.” Taking her cue, I responded that weddings always make me rethink my own misgivings about marriage: “I don’t normally see myself as someone who wants to get married, but when I’m at weddings it always makes me feel slightly terrible I don’t have that kind of bond with someone.” Worrying I had been excessively candid with a stranger who might now genuinely pity me, I quickly added a campy addendum: “WHERE’S MY FUCKING HUSBAND?” She shook her head and then threw it back, finishing her champagne, and said, “I’m married. You don’t want it.”"